Remember that one time when I was going to commit to blogging to help me commit to my diet? Well now you see my commitment problem. Whoops. I have stuck with the diet though. So at least thats something! I'm feeling anxious to weigh in and measure myself officially on Monday. When I see results I get super pumped. This week so far has been so-so. I stayed within my 1200 calories, but here or there when I had extra calories I may have given myself a little something I shouldnt. Of course, I use the excuse of the extra calories. In reality, we both know it's not about calories as much as it is about giving my body nutrition. None the less, I still feel a lot better than last week. Cutting out huge portions, pastas, breads, fast food, loads of sugar.. who wouldn't feel like ass after eating all of that?

My sister came over yesterday and was eating Panda Express. It smelled sooo delightful.  So I grabbed a salad and sat next to her to be smelling and eating at the same time. I'm pathetic.

One thing that has kept me going is the fact that I have outgrown my wardrobe. Or what I call a wardrobe. It's actually only like 5 shirts and one pair of pants. I stopped shopping years ago and recently went through and threw out things that didnt fit. Which was most of it. I am ready to lose about 15-20 lbs before I go shopping for a few things. I don't want to spend a ton of money on clothes that will be too big later. But I would love to find clothes that flatter now, and would still look good 40-60 lbs later. Which will probably be hard, but with my husband in college and me not working, I'm willing to take the challenge. I'm tired of throwing on the same shirt everyday and doing the minimum makeup and putting my hair back. I'm a woman damnit! I should be doing more. I hope in the next week or so I'll start to feel more motivated with that. I can't tell if I'm lazy with my appearance because I'm fat, or because I'm a new mom. I take every ounce of sleep I can get even if that means sacrificing a shower. I'm disgusting I know.

My husband has the next 4 days off of work and school. This is going to be a challenge. My husband is ridiculously skinny and eats what he wants. Which has usually meant that I give in and just eat whatever he's eating while we're out. Who wants to eat a fast food salad? But I think  he knows how serious I am this time around and hopefully wont sit on the couch next to me and eat some fudge or a bucket of ice cream.

Well, my time is up, the baby is awake! My sweet little girl is a little more fun to hang out with than this blog. Hopefully, I mean, I will be back soon!